"Beth Ann is getting married, and Regina moved to Florida to live with her and take care of the babies for them both." I processed those bombshells and tried to keep from reacting. It almost worked, and Colleen moved in for the hug I tried to give her before.I pulled her into a tight embrace and let her cry. I needed to help her cry.We stayed like that for so long, my arm started to go to sleep. Colleen, Jim, and Millie said nothing the entire time I held a shaking, weeping Colleen, then seeing that the moment of truth had passed, Jim said, "I know you're hurting. I know we've stayed away from you, not knowing what to do, nor how to deal with your special circumstances, but we've talked, and we need to be a family again."Please forgive us for trying to protect the babies from your peculiar gift. I know it had to hurt you terribly. When we flew in to see you in the hospital, the last time that you were in the coma, we sat by your bed and tried to imagine how we would explain you to. I love you spread on the satin bed sheets, their cold silky-smooth sensation an erotic contrast to the warm velvet of your skin. Under my hand I feel the tenseness of the smallest muscles as they glide over your body, seeking its warmth and softness. With every touch, every taste I can feel their relaxation, their reaction to my caress, your slow submission to pleasure. I want to take all, be the only reality in your mind - and then I want you to surrender even that to the pleasure I give you. So I watch for every little sign in this dance of joy and intimacy. There is a point, somewhere between anticipation and acceptance, when those small muscles along your side, along your legs, quiver between hard tenseness and soft desire, that last instinctive precipice which keeps you away from giving in to the sensations. I love that moment, the moment when your body is not sure anymore what it wants. My teeth find your neck in a gentle bite, a soft sting. I feel the shiver travelling along.
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